You just don't want to mess with me right now

I'm in a very pissy mood. After the director of the freaking university that certifies me at the end of the year told me that I wouldn't be inspected, that I had nothing to worry about and even went as far as to tell the teacher who has been working with me the whole year that I was off the hook because my other positive reports will compensate and that they are aware of the problems with the person who come to evaluate me. Well, I came to work with a nice surprise this morning: "You will be inspected Friday, May 16 at 8 am, Happy inspection!" 3 days notice. 3 DAYS! All of our other evaluations we know months in advance so that we could prepare our classes, our lesson plans. Now, I am forced to change everything around and just hope and pray the students are on their best behavior, which is not a given because May and June are single handedly the WORST times for an inspection- the students only want one thing, to be out of school.

All of this for one man's caviling. The objections to me passing are trivial, silly, stupid. In January there was a list of 10 student teachers who were in grave danger. I was not on this list and far from it. All of the sudden, if I don't pass this inspection, I have to re-do my whole student teaching year. Can we say unfair? Someone wants me to fail, or at least wants to make it very difficult for me to pass.

Forgive me for the rambling, but I'm just a little tired of red tape. I've already been through red tape enough trying to pass the damn teaching test and now, well, let's just go through some more red tape because I'm not considered a good teacher in France. How can you be a good teacher in one country and then come to another country and have people tell you that you were not made for this profession?

But, I'm not giving up. Please wish me luck for Friday. In 3 days notice and having to do something other than the Unit test I had planned, plus students who are a little on the wild side after all this vacation we've had (just back from a 5 day weekend), I am going to try and pull something together.

And, in the end if I have to do another year over again, well, at least one of my children isn't sick with a terminal illness or my husband with health problems and at least I still have my family around. You always have to think in those terms when life throws you minor curve balls like a teaching inspection. Sometimes, I think less dramatic things like these put off the more dramatic ones. At least for awhile.

Comments

[Alice]

That totally stinks that they're throwing this inspection at you out of nowhere! I definitely don't understand this whole system, and it just sounds like you've been through the wringer in so many ways -- and yet you work so hard at your job and it seems like you definitely do it so well! I just will NEVER get that mentality in France, that any hard work and effort you do is for naught if it isn't "up to snuff" from "their" point of view. I just don't get it.

Hang in there, and I'm sure you'll pull through with flying colors! I'm sending you positive, strong vibes.