Confidence

For the first time in my life, I feel confident, maybe even too much so. I've always been the little mouse running after people, apologizing infinitely, groveling at feet, and shaking with fear around the presence of any type of administrative superior. No more. It doesn't get you anywhere.

This year, one of my goals was to be confident in myself, my classroom strategy, my teaching and to use that confidence in all areas of my life. Already we are two weeks into the school year, and I feel great, on top of things and couldn't love my job any more. What a wonderful and fulfilling opportunity teaching is. Each night I come home, I can't wait to get back in there again the next day! The challenge of showing the students how to learn keeps me going all the time. Did I say how much I love it?

I am no longer afraid to speak to my superiors and try at every moment to go towards people rather than hide from them, and I've met a lot of wonderful colleagues because of it. I am also immensely enjoying the teacher training we're receiving twice a week- lots of new ideas to integrate into the classroom and lots of ways to structure the class. This year is going to be good.

I think there is a way to be too confident though, and I do need to calm things down and accept a little humiliation. But, part of that confidence is being able to do that- bring it on- I want cricicism, I want to know what I'm doing wrong, I want to get better! This is the first time in my life I haven't felt afraid to bloom, if you accept that cheesy expression, to go for it and not be afraid if I'm doing the right thing or saying the wrong thing. So, this past week I've been on a high with what this new confidence can bring- namely respect. And, I honestly feel that my weakness wouldn't have allowed me to successfully pursue this career beforehand. It's a blessing in disguise that I didn't pass that test sooner because if I had, I'm not sure to have made it. Up to this point, I've had a hard time accepting any criticism and have been rather defensive but I can already tell that this year, my mind is much more open and less on guard and I can't wait for it to take off in full swing!

Comments

[San Francisco]

Hi Andie
Good luck with your student teaching. Are you teaching 7 hours a day or 7 hours a week? I am a former teacher and 7 hours a day seems like a long day.

Thanks

[Lauren]

Sounds like a good start to the year!